I’m not okay.
On sunday I was driving back to the country to see my family. I hadn’t seen them in about a month. I really needed my space after everything that has happened.
There’s a turn off that takes you directly back to my hometown, or you can continue on that takes you into the countryside to the farm where I grew up. At the last second I took the turn and continued on to my childhood home.
The fields were beautiful, it took me right back to my childhood days. Everything was so simple back then, and I had my mother in my life still. I stopped down the road from my old house. I could see people in the yard so I didn’t want to get too close. There are no other houses nearby so I didn’t want to seem creepy.
I had my cry. I hopped back in my car wiping back the tears and went into town as if nothing ever happened. I didn’t tell anyone I went back to visit. They don’t need to know.
Why did I feel so compelled to visit? I don’t think I’m okay.